Bert Terpstra (1949)

Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

Rumi

Acceptance of what life brings is a source of healing. After my first wife died in 1996, many things have been healed in me in the grieving process, including pain from my childhood. Since then I also do not experience the feeling of loneliness any more.

The acceptance I found is not a “settling for”, but is peace with my life as it was, because it brought exactly and timely what I needed for my further growth and development, just as the above poem by Rumi expresses. I embrace my life without rejecting anything in it or in myself. Thus I can be with any experience, even when the experience is not easy.

This is what I bring to the work. Since I am at peace with who I am including my limitations, clients also feel at ease being present with there imperfections. Then true acceptance is possible instead of trying to help or change things. Only when one fully accepts things as they are can they begin to transform.

For me this work is a path of inner growth and renewal: by moving into an inner space where I have no assumption, hypothesis, expectation or plan, something truly new can arise. Making this step into the unknown every time I facilitate a constellation keep my mind open and brings me in direct contact with the novelty in any moment.

What moves and motivates me in this work is the love and other deeply human qualities that are always present even in the most painful family entanglements.

Bert Terpstra (1949)

Bert Terpstra followed training in family constellations in the Netherlands and in Germany. He studied mathematics at the University of Leyden and is editor of the book Conquest of Abundance of philosopher of science Paul Feyerabend. In 2000 and 2001 he was interim general manager of a production company. At present he has a practice in family constellations.